Josh-Kerr.com

I’m sitting here at home packing for our mission trip to Guatemala and I have to say I’m pumped about it. It’s kinda weird actually. Here I am spending my vacation time in another country and I’m not relaxing, I’m working. But to me, that is vacation. I have never been able to just sit and do nothing. When I find myself in those situations I go nuts. I was even that way on our honeymoon :( So here I go, to another country to do God’s work. That in itself is another thing that I find weird. Some are probably thinking, ‘he, a Christian, thinks that doing God’s work is weird?’ and to that I just have to say, I know?! I’ve grown up in a Christian home and for the most part, it’s all I’ve ever known. I was never a real trouble maker, always did good in school, and got along with just about everyone. I’m the nice guy that you either know or hear about. I’ll treat you with respect and help you out in any way I can. I go to church, I love my wife, and serve God. I’ve had a good life thus far and I’m extremely grateful for it.

You may be asking yourself, so whats the problem? I know I was. Despite my blessed life I’ve fought and still am fighting my own personal demons. What most non-believers fail to understand is that being a Christian doesn’t make you any better or worse than anybody else. It means that you’re forgiven. That’s it. That’s the big mystery. I am forgiven of my sins through Christ alone. My problem is that no matter how hard I try I still fail and obeying God and doing what he says/wants. Despite my blessed life I used to yearn for a life with out God. I turned from him, walked my own path, and did what I wanted to do. Thankfully it didn’t last long and I didn’t do anything ‘bad’ but it’s something I still have to live with and fight off each day. I’ve accepted God’s forgiveness and blessings but I still know that I, symbolically speaking, spat in God’s face and told him I didn’t need him. The feeling is the same feeling you get when you do something wrong despite knowing the costs and you hurt someone you love. It’s not a good feeling. Thankfully God is patient, forgiving, and loving because I’d given up on myself a long time ago but not Him. My life has changed much since then and I’ve been yearning to live a life that pleases Him. Sure I stumble, but I have good friends that help me get back up. My ‘walk’ with the Lord has been much smoother since then and it’s amazing how much better I feel now compared to when I tried to live on my own understanding.

Which brings us back to why I think it’s a little weird that I’m going on a mission trip to do God’s work. Only He would take someone who “spitted in his face” and say, ‘You are my child and though you turned from me for a time I still love you and will always love you.’ I don’t know why I’m going on this mission trip other than the fact that God placed it on my heart to go. I don’t know what I’ll do, what I’ll say, or what to expect other than I’ll do. I do know that God wants me there, I’ll speak for God threw God, and I’ll do what he tells me to do. I know this will be a life changing experience and I’m looking forward to it.

Proverbs 3:5-6, NIV

Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Do not depend on your own understanding. In all ways remember him. Then he will make your paths smooth and straight.

Jeremiah 1:5, NIV

Before I formed you in your mother’s body I chose you. Before you were born I set you apart to server me. I appointed you to be a prophet to the nations.

Psalm 139:13-16, NKJV

For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are Your works and that my soul knows well. My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed, and in Your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them